GREG GUTFELD: ‘Diversity, equity & inclusion’ has done it again

Now, the Seattle Public School system is phasing out its highly capable cohort schools designed for gifted students who could skip the lessons designed for other kids their age. You know, nerds. But just when you thought Seattle couldn’t get any dumber, it does something literally to do just that, and can you guess why? That’s right, because it’s racist.

You see, those programs have too many students from the bad races. Last year, over 50% of the advanced students were White, 16% Asian, 3.4% Black. There just weren’t enough Black, Latino, Indigenous, Alaskan and Pacific Islander students.

So I guess we could say goodbye to the NBA real soon, right? What’s that? Oh, we don’t use that type of insane reasoning when it’s sports? What a strange demarcation. People say, “Don’t do that with basketball, but let’s do it with less important stuff. You know, like education.”

So the schools got canceled like it was hosted by Don Lemon. And why? Well, it’s not about how smart these kids are. It’s not about what’s up here. It’s about what’s on here. It’s about what these kids look like when they’re in a classroom together.

It’s about embarrassing their teachers and administrators just by being themselves. I don’t know, but that sounds pretty racist to me. So now, instead of putting the brainiacs in their own class with their own teacher and curriculum, all those brats are being lumped together, and the teacher’s expected to come up with different lesson plans for different levels.

OK, kids, today’s vocabulary word is mediocrity. Does anyone here know what that means? Mediocrity is what happens when the people who run our country force us all to lower our standards so the elites can pat themselves on the back for their atrocious beliefs. And that’s what it’s about: the continuing destruction caused by luxury beliefs, which are bad ideas that bestow status on the elites who hold them while inflicting pain on everyone else who must endure them.

You see it with climate activism, criminal justice, and now here in education. An enlightened progressive already has their college degrees, their house and two electric cars, so they’re immune from their own destruction, but God help your kids.

And so in Seattle, the smart kids will be reading “The Gutfeld Monologues,” while in the same classroom, the slow kids will be reading “Get It Together” by Jesse Watters. The kids who are already reading Shakespeare are stuck in the same room with the kids still eating boogers and paste.

In my case, it was both. Glue tastes great, but now I get to eat the whole horse. But today, helping kids of all races advance at their own pace is now considered inequitable, and holding highly intelligent children back is now considered equitable. And yes, that includes Black kids.

In fact, those who complained about shutting down these schools included Black parents. And guess what the school board VP reportedly told them: They were being tokenized by the White parents.

She was probably in the slow class, which once again, is mind-numbingly racist, but to the elites, it’s as if Black parents don’t have minds of their own, as if they don’t have the same hopes and concerns about their children as everybody else to one day be like me, you know — rich enough to own a helicopter that could drop porta-potties into Kilmeade’s swimming pool.

Not only are some of the smartest kids in school being punished for what they look like, but so are the smart kids these DEI fanatics claim to be helping.

Call me old-fashioned, but the only reason kids should be punished for what they look like is if they’re chubby. The smartest kid might be Black, but now he has to sit next to the dumbest kid in school who might be White or Asian. Well, probably not Asian. When I was a kid and we had a test coming up, everybody wanted to sit next to the Asian kid. It’s the only reason George Takei had friends. 

But sadly, like it or not, these kids are learning what modern America is all about. It’s not about living up to your potential as an individual. It’s about what you look like as part of the herd, you’re just part of the group you have no control of — which is why I quit Menudo.

And of course, anybody who dares to question this is racist, and that includes Black parents who realize their gifted children are being punished, and they’re exactly right. Finally, something every race can agree on, which is why the idiots who make the rules won’t let us.

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